3 Steps To Implement Self-Care
Congratulations! If you are here, you're finding ways to prioritize self-care and and in doing so, be your best-self. Continue through the Mama-Self Care section to learn different ways to establish self-care into your life.
Before we identify the Self-Care YOU need, let’s talk a bit about how we got away from it.
Self-care is often overlooked in our lives. We pour ourselves into our children, partners, friends and work. It's an easy path to to get down and I don't know a mom who hasn't traveled there.
We somehow trick ourselves, very often in motherhood, that the MORE we give, the better we will feel. That’s what GREAT moms do, right? WRONG! We have to replenish our cup. And the best way to do that is through Self-Care.
BONUS: Model for your children that self-care is crucial to their wellness
You don’t want your kids to ignore their needs. If your child is running themselves thin, you tell them to replenish their cup. But you have to show them how.
"If you want your children to respect their worth, take time for themselves, recognize when they need a break and know what they need to recharge-you have to show them how to do it!"
One of my top “Mama Mantras” is: WHAT YOU MODEL IS WHO THEY BECOME
If you want your children to respect their worth, take time for themselves, recognize when they need a break and know what they need to recharge-you have to show them how to do it!
Instead of seeing your challenges with motherhood as an overwhelming frustration, see them as an opportunity to show your children how to handle stress.
But how do you that?
Follow these simple steps to figure it out:
Answer these questions:
1. Before having children, what hobbies and interests did you have?
2. What calms you? What makes you feel at ease? What activities or places make you feel balanced?
3. What do you enjoy learning about? What do you spend time researching on the internet?
Find solutions to the answers you wrote down:
1. Find a Hobby. Or Rekindle One.
How can you pursue those interests or hobbies? Even if it takes reframing, FIND A WAY TO DO IT! You are a human being, with one life. Get creative with your solutions. The solution does not have to look exactly like it did before you had kids for you to enjoy it. Example: if you used to be a dancer and dance classes are not an option, turn on some music and dance in your living room! Ummm...actually, we should all do this anyway :)
2. Find A Way to Relax
We all need to find ways to UNWIND. Taking a bath while sipping wine, reading a trashy romance novel or practicing yoga-if you’re like me, a short walk outside is enough to relax or even a five minute stretch indoors. You have to turn your mind “off” so that it is able to rest. Don’t turn to your phone or computer! Scouring Pinterest or Facebook will not relax you (Damn you, Pinterest Fixer Upper Searches!) Simple breathing exercises can help greatly, as well.
3. Find Ways to Keep Evolving
After identifying what you like to learn about, go and LEARN MORE! We are always evolving. Or at least, we should be. I learned this lesson from my Grandma. She was 62 when she passed the bar and became a lawyer. Just because you’re out of school doesn’t mean that you have to stop learning. Learning keeps you young, excited, passionate! Don’t worry-you don’t have to pursue a law degree to keep it interesting! Just go get a library card and check out two books on a topic you’re interested in. Try to learn something new online rather than scrolling through social media. Something as simple as...how do you make homemade yogurt? That's on my list :)
Implement these into your life.
- Write down the solutions you came up with.
- Schedule them into your life. If you need to read for 15 minutes to start your morning right, do it! It’s great if your kids see you read. If you need to do yoga for 15 minutes at night, do it. It’s great if your kids see you do yoga. Simply tell them…and your partner, if needed, that this is your time and you will help them after you are done. Set a timer and take the full 15 minutes.
- Write in the comments how you are choosing self-care TODAY. Accountability is a great tool :)
- When feeling discouraged, use the mantra: WHAT WE MODEL IS WHO THEY BECOME
You deserve it, Mama.
Are you a self-care guru? Share your tips in the comments!
Cheers,
Nicolette
What we model is who they become.